Lifting the Burden of Perfectionism in Children

Excellent article on perfectionism in kids and how to help.

Free Spirit Publishing Blog

By Thomas S. Greenspon, Ph.D., author of  What to Do When Good Enough Isn’t Good Enough: The Real Deal on Perfectionism: A Guide for Kids

Lifting the Burden of Perfectionism in ChildrenIf you are reading this blog post, you’re probably well aware that we live in a society steeped in performance pressures. For our kids, the competition to be at the top of the class in school, to make it into the best colleges, to have the best shot at prestigious careers, and to be outstanding in those careers is intense. Their A game must be brought to every encounter.

The anxiety attendant to all of this pressure is visible everywhere, and it’s one horn of a major dilemma: We worry that our children won’t make the grade, and we worry that the pressure to make the grade is too great. All of this creates a social context in which perfectionism—the desire to be perfect, plus the…

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6 thoughts on “Lifting the Burden of Perfectionism in Children

  1. It is one thing to encourage children to do their best and quite another to shove them into a mold. When I see little girls doing pageants it breaks my heart. Sure they are beautiful but they are supposed to be allowed to be children. Makeup veneers on their teeth even plastic surgery performed and they are just beautiful children the way God made them. Maybe God will send a breeze of positive energy to touch the hearts of the people who grind their children to dust.

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    1. I know what you mean. It’s crazy the length parents go to and their child cannot be enjoying it, maybe they enjoy the attention but the parent could just play with their child instead of making them grow up too fast.

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  2. The world has become so competitive and perfectionist these days, that we push ourselves so hard. We then project this onto our kids. The world shows us in a thousand different ways that being “normal” and “average” just won’t cut it. I do pray for a world where children who are merely “normal and happy” will be allowed to stay that way, without turning them into robotic perfectionists that achieve more and feel little.

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